Judge less thou be judged, and enter the world of miracles!!!!
Sai Baba was asked how he could perform his many miracles of physical manifestation. His reply was that he simply does not judge. Does that mean perhaps that, as a collective if we followed his example we could live in a world were miracles were the norm?
It seems that once one gets any type of exposure, (or dares to follow ones own truth, rather than that of the homogenous tribe.), - it stimulates a response in some people to try to bring that individual down. We have all seen the sadistic annihilation of celebrities in the gutter press. Vile remarks about people seem to draw our attention .It is a waste of life to focus on banalities or negative interpretations of any one. If you go along with the premise- ‘you are where your attention takes you’, you may wish to ask, -do I really want to be ugly or meaningless? I have often been the focus of bitchery which is some times published. In the past this made me feel really bad. I am lucky to have techniques and information which I would like to share on how to 'rise above it.'
Maslow says that -‘One of the most important things about being a self actualised person is to be independent of the good opinion of others’ I have been on the end of the stereotypes of negative female behaviours of -bitchiness, Judgement and moral evaluation of other females.
Personal growth guru Wayne Dwyer says that who ever squeezes an orange, will get orange juice .If some one squeezes you, what comes out is you. We all project our stuff onto others. How we judge people is ultimately an insight into our own self-judgement. When we bitch and needlessly criticise we are as Jung pointed out, talking about our own 'dark shadow' we are effectively describing negative aspects of our own psyche.
Negative experiences can be manifestations of our own low self esteem. Ultimately weird people come to us through our negative thoughts about our selves. These attract negative people to act out these thoughts. The trick is to truly love your self. This is what I am learning. I no longer care what people say, as I really know that it says much more about them. When people say they think some one is beautiful, I know they are seeing their own light shadow, I know that they are beautiful.
The aim of a campaigning to make me into an object of ridicule and obscenity is to distract from my unconventional, anarchic and challenging nature .People who like to fit in and be good may feel jealous and afraid of those like me who run with the Wolves.
The Buddha was asked by one of his followers ‘how can you be so tolerant and loving, in the face of the ugly lies said about you by your enemies?’ He replied ‘If some one gives me a present and I do not accept it that then does it belong to?’ I am learning not to accept the evaluations of those who feel the need to categorise me as some thing bad. I am not prepared any more to make what others do or say be the source of my emotional status.
I am not interested in fundamentalism or moralising. Morals are social constructs and vary even within subcultures, they are not absolutes. I am not interested in bending and twisting my self to fit in. I am interested in freedom and liberty. We can all shine in our own way. I have a deep need to express myself exactly as I want too, and not how people who have not reached my level of freedom want me to be. You are free to do it your way. I have no interest in converting any one to my point of view, - although I enjoy sharing it. I hope I say things that help and inspire others, not take them to a dark and cold place.
When you choose aspiritual path, forces react to give you the challenges you need. Kabalalists call this the ‘opponent’ who raises the bar to encourage you to try harder. In Kabbalistic philosophy they warn against reactive behaviour, even when provoked because this propagates the energy of chaos. I do believe we are all one and when we hurt others we ultimately in put into the universal chaos. When we judge we separate ourselves from the object judged. Abraham talks of the ‘Law of allowing’ if we all followed this principle we would be acting from our truth without fear or sanctions. If we come from spirit the things that we will want to do will be good. The Native Americans say ‘No tree would be foolish enough to have branches that fight with each other’ the ancient Egyptian religious text defines the principle of spiritual unity succinctly. -‘I am all which is, I am all what it is, what will be. No mortal man has lifted my veil. To me all things owe their existence.’
People who are envious or competitive try to make the subject of their loathing feel like they are intrinsically wrong or bad. However. Mother Teresa, Buddha, Gandhi and Jesus all had enemies who wanted them dead. It seems even being a saint who does lots of good to the world, has not made anyone immune from negative evaluation.
Rumi says ‘Out there is a field where there is no right doing or wrongdoing I will meet you there’. Blessings and love to you all.
ISHTAR X
NEW! Read YOUR responses to the Twisted Knickers article
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*1Your Responses to Twisted Knickers
Hiya Ishtar!...
I've just been sent your Arabesque video by my friend and former belly dance teacher, and I was so excited when I heard your scouse accent! It was so refreshing to hear your lovely voice-which isn't common at all- I've just read the"Pubegate"article!
With re. to this "Pubegate" business...well, I am actually familiar with some of the "hens" mentioned in the article and I can only say that their vitriol doesn't surprise me in the least....I've heard similar bitchiness directed at other dancers too, and it's no coincidence that they too were very pretty younger women, with lots of natural talent.
It's a simple case of jealousy, but sadly, these ladies have let their green -eyed monsters totally consume them, to the point of insanity!! I don't know when all this nastiness started, but I just hope that it is all in the past now,and that it hasn't hurt you too much. Just be the strong,beautiful and enchanting goddess that you are, and ignore those bitter old harridans!
I was feeling particularly homesick at the time, so hearing your Liverpool accent really cheered me up, and I enjoyed your video so much that I felt inspired to write and tell you!!!! The video was very professionally done, with lovely background scenery and music. And you..well you are absolutely gorgeous and a mesmeric performer... how do you dance so beautifully in high heels!!
Brightest Blessings!
(name and email supplied)
Paula,
You don't know me but I've been to a few of your "do's" at the Camel Club and had a great time.
Just read your article "Pubegate" and felt compelled to salute you!lol
I've heard so much about this from various people/"hens" - what a load of bollocks!! I do know the "hens" and I'm not into taking sides, and wouldn't, but until now, hadn't heard your version of events.
Bloody women and gossip!
Loved your article, made me chuckle. Life's too short isn't it?
Glad you rose above it all!
Take care,
(name and email supplied)
Felt compelled to reply, and commend you. There is no shame in standing up for yourself, especially in such an eloquent manner (and I am even referring to swearing. I study language and I firmly believe that selectively, well placed swear words are a vital part to conveying strong feelings, effectively). You do not at all seem mean. I feel privileged to have such a wonderfully talented teacher, not just in terms of your dancing, but in teaching us about life, and anyone who does not embrace this is severely losing out.
You serve as an example to us all as a strong, confident woman, and a caring and beautiful human being.
Meryl
Hi Ishtar
Just read Twisted Knickers - the pubegate file. It blew me away. There is so much in that article its amazing! The sad story of your 'hens' (Love the analogy) getting worked up over an accidental flash of your pubes. As you say just an excuse to pursue their own vindictive agenda. Sad people leading sad unfulfilled lives, no doubt deep down in their own subconscious they are jealous of you. They see your life so full and diverse. You are outgoing, sharing, teaching, performing across a wide range range of disciplines; bellydance, theatre, performance art, goddess theory, music and more. It must really piss off the suburban mindset.
At first glance looking at the length of the article on the screen side slider, I thought you were making a meal of this one ..... but then as your article unfolded, entwined in the sad story of pubegate is a whole philosophy of life. Although there is nothing new in 'being yourself', you tell it with passion and show how you are yourself come what may. Unlike the sad suburban housewife stuck well done Maslow's hierarchy, most of their lives concerned only with the basics of domesticity... which probably equates with 'shelter', which if I recall correctly is somewhere near the bottom of Maslow's hierarchy of needs.
People with mental boundaries, (which as you know have nothing to do with intelligence, I've met Mensa Members who would be happy in the company of your hens), have imposed limits on life's rich possibilities. Its probably fear. Personal growth can be challenging – I used to be extremely shy, nervous, hated public attention and had very low self confidence and even lower self esteem, not likely attributes for a transgender activist. Becoming involved in the TG scene, and also in political activity was my vehicle for growth, not just releasing my need to cross genders and play with gender stereotypes (You might spot multiple genders in that statement, but thats another long story for the future!) but meeting people I could never have met in my old limited life; I've met artists, politicians, millionaires, druggies, theologians, prostitutes, writers, musicians. Some have become close friends. In a short space of time I could talk at meetings, get on stage in crowed nightclubs and dance (Badly) in front of maybe 500 - 1000 people ... OK I would be stoned but alcohol never used to release my inhibitions. Such a major shift, from my own suburban mentality was not easy, but unlike some I had to do it.
However I have never got it together as well as you. I admire the way your whole life is so balanced and integrated. To me it looks as if your love of the Goddess, underpins your Priestess qualities which makes you a teacher and healer, and your love of life which you express in your dancing and other artistic interests. From all this you have developed a range of business opportunities, developed marketing skills all which brings your special qualities to even more people.
BTW, if ever you hear I am a opposed to people making money, its not true. I am anti-capitalist to the extent that I cannot accept multi-national companies (for the most part chauvinistic patriarchies) making billion pound profits and paying minimum wages to most of their staff, and forcing down the prices they pay for imports from third world countries. In contrast I have no problem with individuals or small businesses (though I prefer collectives) making good livings by providing good value.
Wow... Im going on a bit here. I only intended to say keep up the great work you do. After all what happens to hens in the end... they get stuffed. (Sorry, I couldn't resist the obvious!).
Finally – You ended your article with a delightful flourish – knowing your detractors would read the article you conclude with a lovely photo of your bum which does not need a caption ... it shouts out to them 'Kiss my arse bitch'.
Fabulous stuff.
Love and best wishes
Name provided but due to reprisals prefers to remain anonymous
Hi Ishtar
I have just read, and can totally connect with, your Pubegatefiles article. Whilst I have not had this type of hate campaign I have encountered a fair amount of bitching myself since I started bellydancing five and a half years ago, and before that when I was an aerobics instructor. I admire you for your individuality and I agree with you totally that you should be true to yourself and refuse to conform to the jealous bitches ideals of what you should wear, how you should dance etc. etc. I am a sensitive and creative person but have had to form a harder outer shell as a form of self protection in this business, and quickly, or would not survive.
I was so sad to read your sister had given up dancing because of the bitching, she is so beautiful and reminds me of my younger sister Mandi. Mandi was a pole dancer in Manchester and was struggling to survive when someone kindly shopped her to the DSS. Now she is terrified to go back to dancing because of it. We too come from a creative and theatrical family going back 200 years (with a strong Romany background, my mother didnt live in a house till she was 15 and was terrified to go upstairs to bed since she always slept in the caravan).
I would really love to meet you one day. We are both on the Xanadu website so maybe one day we will get to work together I think we would have so much to talk about. I have a friend Jameela who is also a belly dancer and I think if we did not have each other to talk about all this stuff to we would be crazy with all the bitching and hassle over jobs, I think we could write a book about it all!
Anyway HAPPY DANCING and GOOD ON YA GIRL FOR NOT LETTING THE BITCHES GET YA DOWN.
Name provided but due to reprisals prefers to remain anonymous
Hi Ishtar,
I just want to say that I support your articles wholeheartedly. I think that there is far too much snobbery (and jealousy) entering the bellydance scene. We do a dance which, whether we like it or not, is very sexy and sensual - after all, many of the moves are based on sex/childbirth which is why many women find it so natural and empowering. I suppose dancers could wear ankle length long sleeved baggy, sexless dresses, but apart from the fact that the costume would hide most of the moves, who wants to watch someone perform in a binbag? If I go to watch a dancer, I want to see every move she makes. And when I dance myself, I want the audience (male and female) to watch me, not the waiters or the bloke who's just come in to collect his take-away!
It makes sense to wear clothes that accentuate your body and the moves that you intend to execute. Women may well wear the baggy clothes when dancing for each other, although I understand that they do tie a scarf round themselves to emphasise their hips; but that is just the same as many of us do in class when it's all girls together. When you're performing for an audience though, its a different ball-game - I'm sure no dancer in the middle east, past or present, would wear the same garments for a public performance as they do when they're hanging out with their friends. Its no good doing a shimmy or hip drop in a baggy dress, or rib circles and chest lifts/drops wearing a baggy jumper. also if people go to watch a belly dancer, they look forward to seeing the exotic costumes. If people want traditional dress, how about they dress as the Olud Nail or some of the old Ghawazee, and bare their breasts completely?! Thank God for padded bras, beads and fringes that make me look pert(ish) and proud!
I also support your work for the Palestinians - it's a very touchy subject and many people just don't realise their hardships and the unfairness of their situation. I didn't know alot about their plight until a few years ago when I read a book called 'To the ends of the earth' by David Yallop. Although the book is mainly about his search for Carlos the Jackal, part of his search led him into Israel and what's left of Palestine, where he was accommodated by a Palestinian family. This led to him discovering some of the policies which the west never hears about - random shootings into houses, the attacks on refugee camps etc.
I've had a few 'discussions' on this subject with people I know, but too many people are too ready to lay the blame on the Palestinians without listening to the other side of the story. In fact I had a very heated argument with one of my best friends 2 christmases ago, she had just been to Egypt and visited Israel, and came back full of the 'facts' that the Israeli guide had given her about the terrible things that the Israelis had to endure. I'm pleased to say that she now has a more balanced view on things (so she tells me). I, like many other people, am not good at speaking out for myself, so we need people like you who say what needs to be said.
All I can say is, 'keep up the good work' and WEAR WHAT YOU WANT!!!!!!!
Name provided but due to reprisals prefers to remain anonymous